Smart Leaders Have Strategy—Great Leaders Have Emotional Intelligence

Ever wonder why some leaders just get it—they inspire trust, navigate tough conversations smoothly, and make decisions with clarity? It’s not just IQ or experience—it’s Emotional Intelligence (EI).

EI is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your emotions while also being aware of and influencing the emotions of others. And here’s the best part:

EI isn’t fixed. You can develop it, just like any other leadership skill.

So, if you’re a CEO, founder, leader, or executive looking to grow your business and lead more effectively, investing in your EI is a game-changer. Almost every leader I work with as a client will identify areas of EI for development and with some focus, powerful shifts in leadership often take place. Let’s dive into how you can do it.

Step 1: Strengthen Your Self-Awareness

💡 Why it matters: If you don’t understand your own emotions, how can you expect to manage them—or lead others effectively?

✅ Actions to take:

• Check in with yourself daily. Ask: How am I feeling? What’s driving my emotions today?

• Track emotional triggers. Keep a journal to notice patterns—what situations cause frustration, stress, or excitement?

• Get feedback. Ask trusted colleagues or mentors: How do I show up in meetings? How do I react under pressure?

  
  

🔎 Reflective Questions:

• What situations trigger strong emotional reactions in me?

• How do my emotions influence my decision-making?

• How do I react to feedback—do I get defensive or stay open?

  
  

📖 Resource: "Emotional Intelligence 2.0" by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves —includes a self-assessment to gauge your EI.

"Emotions can get in the way or get you on the way."  - Mavis Mazhura

Step 2: Master Self-Regulation

💡 Why it matters: Strong leaders don’t let emotions hijack their decisions. They stay composed under pressure.

✅ Actions to take:

• Pause before reacting. When emotions rise, take a deep breath. Give yourself 10 seconds before responding.

• Reframe negative thoughts. Instead of “This is a disaster,” try “This is a challenge we can solve.”

• Manage stress proactively. Exercise, meditate, or find a routine that helps you stay centered.

  
  

🔎 Reflective Questions:

• How do I handle pressure?

• Do I take time to process emotions before reacting?

• What tools help me manage stress effectively?

  
  

📖 Resource: "The Daily Stoic" by Ryan Holiday — a great read on emotional control and resilience.

"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response." — Viktor E. Frankl

Step 3: Build Empathy for Stronger Relationships

💡 Why it matters: The best leaders don’t just understand business; they understand people.

✅ Actions to take:

• Practice active listening. Instead of waiting for your turn to speak, focus on what’s being said—and what’s not being said.

• Put yourself in others’ shoes. Ask: What’s their perspective? What pressures are they facing?

• Be curious. Ask open-ended questions like: What’s important to you about this? How can I support you?

  
  

🔎 Reflective Questions:

• Do I truly listen, or do I just wait to respond?

• How often do I ask my team about their challenges or concerns?

• When was the last time I changed my mind based on someone else’s perspective?

  
  

📖 Resource: "Dare to Lead" by Brené Brown — a powerful read on empathy, vulnerability, and authentic leadership.

"Leadership is not domination, but the art of persuading people to work toward a common goal." — Daniel Goleman

Step 4: Sharpen Your Social Skills

💡 Why it matters: Leadership is about influence, collaboration, and bringing people together.

✅ Actions to take:

• Improve your communication. Be clear, direct, and positive in how you deliver messages.

• Work on conflict resolution. Approach disagreements with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

• Show appreciation. A simple “thank you” or acknowledgment goes a long way in building trust.

  
  

🔎 Reflective Questions:

• How do I handle difficult conversations?

• Do I create a safe space for open discussions?

• How well do I adapt my communication style to different people?

  
  

📖 Resource: "Crucial Conversations" by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan & Switzler— a must-read for handling tough discussions.

Step 5: Develop Motivation & a Growth Mindset

💡 Why it matters: Emotionally intelligent leaders are driven not just by external success but by a deeper sense of purpose.

✅ Actions to take:

• Set personal leadership goals. What kind of leader do you want to be in 5 years?

• Find your “why.” Why do you do what you do? Purpose fuels resilience.

• Celebrate progress, not just outcomes. Reflect on how far you’ve come, not just where you’re going.

  
  

🔎 Reflective Questions:

• What motivates me beyond financial success?

• How do I respond to setbacks—do I see them as failures or learning experiences?

• Am I investing in my own leadership development consistently?

  
  

📖 Resource: "Mindset: The New Psychology of Success" by Carol Dweck — on how a growth mindset fuels leadership. Listen to this podcast!

Try This Emotional Intelligence Exercise to Get Started…

✏️ The “3-2-1 Reflection”

At the end of each day, ask yourself:

• 3 emotions I felt today (and what triggered them)

• 2 interactions I handled well (and why)

• 1 thing I’d do differently tomorrow

Simple, powerful, and a great way to build self-awareness. Or try these exercises to grow your Emotional Intelligence!

 Final Thoughts: Make EI Part of Your Leadership Playbook

Emotional Intelligence isn’t just a “soft skill”—it’s a leadership superpower!

It helps you build trust, navigate tough decisions, and drive long-term success. As a professional coach, having helped develop hundreds of leaders, EVERYONE has some aspect of EI they will benefit from focusing on to leverage their personal growth opportunity.

And the best part? It’s completely learnable.

So, where do you start?

👉 Take 5 minutes today to reflect on your EI strengths and growth areas.

👉 Choose one action from this post to implement this week.

👉 Keep growing. Your leadership—and your business—will thank you.

Jerome Dickey, MA (Leadership), PCC, CPHR, QMed